Tuesday, September 2, 2014

It's been a while......

I somehow forgot about my blog after the birth of our miracle son, David.
D is now almost 29 months old! We decided to continue with TTCA when David turned 2. We had a surprise pregnancy in June 2013. It unfortunately ended in an early miscarriage.

Let me start with being a parent after our infertility struggles .....
Being a mommy to D is even better then I ever imagined. He feels our lives with so much love and happiness. D is a huge talker and is such a loving, affectionate toddler. I could not complain if I even tried!
So recently D has been asking for "a baby sister" and I swear that Big D nor myself put the thought in his head. ;)
Life has just been so good that we honestly were not ready to start thinking about having baby #2. The surprise BFP and then loss in 6/2013 was very emotional and I just was not sure if I could handle losing another baby. We decided to put our fears aside and starting trying. No more BCP'S! We got our next BFP fairly easy, but I just knew it wasn't going to last. We then had our 5th miscarriage. It was a chemical pregnancy. Knowing I have 5 angels in heaven makes the thought of going to heaven someday exciting, but how I wish and long for my babies to be here with us. I grieved each one knowing I will see them again someday in heaven. That helped me get threw.
So David wants a sibling and we want another child. The thought of TTCA is so scary. We no longer seem to have trouble getting pregnant, I seem to be unable to keep them long. I feel my body has failed me. There are lots of emotions to work threw and new feelings pop up all the time.

Next post will have some new and hopeful news!


Friday, June 29, 2012

David Alexander is Here!!!

Let's start with my birth story....

I was scheduled to be induced on Mon. April 9, 2012, but my son had other plans.
It all began on Sat. April 7, 2012. I woke up at 4am to some very strong cramps. I went to the bathroom and was surprised to see that I was bleeding heavily and had lost my mucas plug. Excitement started to set in as I realized that I just may be going into labor on my own. I laid back down in bed, but was awoken to strong contractions around 6am. I got out of bed and started timing my contractions. It wasn't until around 6pm that things started to pick up. I was having contractions every 6 to 7 mins. lasting about 45 seconds each. We decided to call my OB around 11pm. We were told to come to labor and delivery. David and I got into the car and headed to the hospital. We were really relaxed considering the circumstances. It hit me on the drive that this would be my last car ride as a pregnant woman. We would soon be hoding our son in our arms.

The Hospital.....

We arrived at the hospital around 1am on April 8, 2012. I was immediately checked into triage and was examined. I was only 1cm dialated and about 75% effaced. The nurse told us that it would be up to the doctor, we may have the baby today or we could be sent home until things picked up a bit more. Thankfully the doctor admitted me and said "Let's have a baby!". I was started on pitocin around 3am. My contractions started coming much quicker and were so much stronger. The pain was getting bad. I was trying to hold off on the epidural for as long as possible, I wanted to expierence everything. After all, we had been waiting almost 4 years for this miracle. I used the birthing ball for about an hour and used my breathing, but around 7am the pain was so intense, I was ready for my epidural. Pitocin makes contractions much stronger and more painful than natural contractions and I was ready for some relief. I had my epidural around 7:30am. OMG, I just have to say that the person that invented the epidural is a GENIUS and my personal hero. ;) I was finally able to relax. Apparently the epidural was the right choice for us because when I was exaimed at 8am I was 4cm dialated and 100% effaced. My doctor broke my water. It was now just time to wait, and boy did we wait! I was fairly comfortable and able to nap off and on until around 6pm. I started to feel pressure and called the nurse. She checked me and gave us great news, 10cm dialated, time to push! :)
I started pushing around 6:40pm. My epidural was now off and I felt like I could feel EVERYTHING. Each contraction brought so much pain. Pushing was so exhausting. My wonderful husband Dave was an amazing coach and he was always by my side cheering me on. I pushed for 1 hour and 45 mins.
At 8:32pm the most amazing miracle happened. At 8:32pm I gave the final push that brought our beautiful son into this world! Priase God!
I can not even put into words how that moment felt. I have never felt as much love as I did that moment. It was absolute pure bliss! I was in complete awe. Pure love took over my mind, body and soul. David's first cry was the most beautiful sound in the world. My OB immediately laid him on my chest and he looked into my eyes. The most beautiful person in the world, my son, David.

David Alexander was born on April 8th, Easter Sunday, at 8:32pm. He weighed 8lbs 13oz and was 22inches long.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

40 Weeks and 3 Days Pregnant!

We are so close to the finish line!

This post is very late, but I am starting to update my blog, finally. This photo was taken
April 1, 2012.




Wednesday, February 1, 2012

32 Weeks Pregnant!

Wow, I can hardly believe that we have made it this far. I am 8 months pregnant today! Thank You God!

These last couple weeks have been so great and exciting. Dave and I painted the nursery and put together David's crib. I get teary eyed when I walk into the nursery because I never really believed that we would ever have a nursery in this house. I am so grateful.
My baby shower is on Saturday Febuary 4, 2012. I am so excited. I am just overwhemled with emotions. I feel so much love, joy and excitement for our future. My family has been absolutely amazing and I feel that my depression has lifted which has brought me so much closer to my family. I have the most amazing family and I feel that  infertiltiy has really blocked me from them in the past. My depression was just so bad that I didn't care to participate in anything and I lost the closeness that I use to have. I am so thankful that it is all in the past and that I can now enjoy Sunday dinners with family and I again feel that I am a part of my family. It is so amazing and brings me so much happiness. I am trying not to take a single day for granted.
Infertiltiy is such a cruel disease and it reeks havoc in everyones lives. I pray that anyone suffering will be lifted by God and carried thru these hard times. No one desereves to go thru infertility. God is capable is of everything and anything. I have faith that He will help all that are suffering.

I am so grateful for our miracle and thank God everyday!
Praise the Lord! Thank You God! <3 <3 <3

33 Weeks, Dave and I

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Belly Pictures :o)

I am a little late with this, but I think I figured out how to do it.
Here goes....

15 weeks pregnant
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25 weeks pregnant
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David and I at Christmastime. :o)
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Thursday, November 10, 2011

We are expecting a healthy Baby BOY!!! :o)

I am 20 weeks pregnant this week. Thank You God, Praise the Lord! I am so thankful for this miracle!
We had our anatomy scan at 18 weeks and found out that we are having a son! Baby boy is looking completely healthy and growing just as he should be. He was moving all around during our ultrasound, he was like a little jumping bean. It was so amazing to watch. We have a DVD from that ultrasound and some beautiful profile pictures. I had to go in for a repeat scan this week at 20 weeks because the tech missed some measurements of his heart and face. Of course, I was nervous and worried, but everything turned out great and our son is looking absolutely perfect.

Being pregnant is the most amazing expierence I have had in my life so far. After 3 years of infertiltiy and lossing 2 babies to early miscarriages we are being blessed with our miracle. Unfortunately, I probably worry alot more than I should, but my past has left me with some PTSD. I am trying my best to enjoy every single moment of this journey. I am not taking anything for granted.
I felt the baby kick for the first time at 18.5 weeks. It was so surreal. Now I feel him kicking and moving everyday. It is the most wonderful feeling ever. I have dreamt of this moment for so long. Every kick astonishes me. That little kick fills me with so much love and joy. David felt our son kick for the first time this week. It was so great to be able to share that moment with him and I never will forget it.
I am just so thankful for what our future together holds. For now I am enjoying every small milestone that we pass. I love this child more than I ever thought possible.
I continue to pray and thank God everyday for this miracle. God is Great!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

First Trimester *~*~*~ God Has Truly Blessed Us!

We are almost 11 weeks pregnant with our amazing miracle! I have had 4 sonograms. This has been the most amazing expierence in my whole life! Of course, I am still nervous alot and find myself pinching my arm "Is this real?", but I know it is and God is amazing!
Our first sonogram was at 6w3d. We saw our beautiful baby and the amazing heartbeat at 106bpm. Everything was measuring a bit behind for our first sonogram, the baby measured 5w5d.
Our second sonogram was at 7w3d. The baby grew and was measuring right on target. We heard the beautiful heartbeat again at 148bpm.
Our third sonogram was at 8w3d. Our baby grew so much and we could make out his or her head and bottom. Beautiful heartbeat at 173bpm.
Our fourth songram and last visit with our great Re Dr. M. was at 9w3d. We could make out our baby's head, body, bottom, arms and legs. It was so amazing! We saw and heard our beautiful baby's heartbeat at 189bpm. The baby was even moving around. Pure joy and gratefulness filled me.
I was released to my OB. So that means no more weekly ultrasounds. It makes me sad that I wont get to see our baby as much, but it is such a great step to be released to a regular OB. Our next sonogram probably won't be until 18wks. to 20wks.

I ordered a home fetal doppler (Sonoline B) and it should arrive by the end of the week. I am very excited that we will be able to listen to our miracle's heartbeat at home whenever we want! I pray that we are able to find it easily. Sometimes home dopplers can lead to more worry instead of comfort, but I have faith that it will work great.

I guess now I will talk about the different symptoms that I have had so far. I am on progesterone supplements because my progesterone was on the low side. I do a PIO injection every night along with suppositories.
My first symptom was a heaviness in my breast, that was before I even took the HPT. Then around 6w5d I was hit with horrible all day moring sickness. It slowly got worse and to the point where I couldnt keep anything down and became dehydrated. My Re prescribed me a medication called promethazine. It is a Wonder drug! I feel 95% better. Headaches just recently started. They come and go. Nothing to bad. I also have to admit to mood swings, but my husband is so amazing and has been so wonderful. I am so thankful to have such an amazing man as my best friend and husband. He is going to be an amazing Daddy! :o)

I know this post is all great news, but I do want to say that infertility still effects me on a daily basis. I refuse to have "IF Amnesia". The struggles and loss of our 2 angels still way heavily on me and worry is never far from the front of my mind. My faith in God is what keeps me going and keeps optimistic. I have so much faith that God will protect and provide for this amazing new life growing inside of me.
My due date is March 30, 2012. :o)

<3 <3 <3 Thank You God! Praise the Lord! <3 <3 <3